Been a LONG time.

[per_solo]

I just don't have as much to say on Livejournal as once I did. Kind of amazing, actually.

School is taking up a lot of my time...this semester, I've got 3 400 level classes, and a Stats class. This one is more like theory of stats, so hopefully I'll do better on it. The other classes..one is hospitality Law...another is Global Tourism, and the last is on Australia.

I've got less than a year left, and loans are starting to loom...frightening close.

I'm watching some insanity with some local groups, and dealing with a cat that doesn't want to hit her litter box. That last is driving me crazy. Floor, and corner of my couch is...gah. We've gone to cleaning her box every day, and recently I cleaned the entire box (like, cleaned it all), and she still prefers to hit my couch. Grrrr.

Add in that I found out the other day that a guy I'd been friends with in Elementary and Middle School killed himself (We'd had a massive falling out in HS...long story/trauma), and that how/why he'd done it was due to his wife wanting a divorce. There is more to the story, I'm sure...such as the fact that he was one of the most selfish sons-a-bitches I ever met, and the suicide strikes me as similar. Add in that I see people fighting shitty situations, and still mustering through...still fighting, and I get a little...irked? At the idea that someone takes the easy way out. Never minding the chaos they sow in their families. I'm trying to think if if know anyone who isn't having a rough time right now...from concerns over jobs, and how to pay the bills, and lack of communication, to actual physical problems, to great concerns over family...

I'm also trying to get the apartment clean...I'm not sure we've had it "GREAT" since we moved in..and after our leech was kicked out, we've kinda done the "small potshots" at cleaning. That is one of my goals..to get the apt. cleaned...and I'm noticing a few things I need to do to get it that way. So, am trying to schedule time in to do that.

In addition, just found out about auditions for a local fan-film that will be held in a few weeks...am going to try for a speaking part in that. I see one that pulls at me, so at the very least will give it a try. It's been quite a while since I was in front of a camera...that might help with a little of the restlessness I've been feeling. That awkward feeling that you are on top of a jenga tower, and if someone pulls the wrong brick, you're falling. Doesn't help that I'm paying attention to what is going on with friends, and am noting that there is a lot of "wrong" in lives right now...and that I wish there were a lot more I could do to help. I feel quite trapped in what is going on around me right now...and the only way I've seen to remove that trap is to start looking at the overall, and seeing what chunks of things I can control, and affect. And to work on those. I'll hope that things slide to a point where I can help...and if not, will just hope the best for friends in the line of fire.

Will try to make my next update sooner, rather than later. :-)

Comments

[rowa17.livejournal.com]

I was actually JUST wondering about you! Good to hear from you.

Yeah, a lot of life is just relinquishing control, I'm realizing. I can't help/save everyone.

[echoweaver.livejournal.com]

When I have litter box problems with my cats, which is admittedly not that often (they have other probs :-p), I spray the spot heavily with cat repellent. It's a spray you should be able to get at a pet store. I think this is especially useful if the cat has picked a favorite not-litter box spot.


You're closing in on that degree. That's so awesome.

[per_solo]

Thanks for the tip, and encouragement. :-) It's close enough now that I'm starting to have what feel like minor panic attacks...and am debating researching if that is "normal".

[per_solo]

Thanks, I'm still keeping up, just finding little time to collect thoughts and put them on the LJ.

It is a lot of giving up control of things you can't control. I've never been too good at that...long line of "Save the World" people..and realizing that I can do minor things that can help others save their world. I think it falls to learning limits. :-)

[oftenrebuked.livejournal.com]

Strangely enough I have been away from the journal too. Have this whole online social hell of facebook, emails and then work crap online, it sucks life outta me I swear. Trying to re-organize my life too. Crazy maybe its just in the planetary alignment or something. Holding onto live journal blog to make me a bit accountable to myself, to do what is good for me. Haha I think your the only friend I have left on here that is still here. That is okay not sharing half of what I post anyway, again its for myself that I am still here.
As far as your cat problem, you will never get the "scent" outta couch, so get rid of the cat or the couch. I would probably get rid of couch and put a litter box in whatever corner she chooses! Who needs a couch anyway? Sorry I really love cats.
And life well it goes on, and when I thought at this age it would be a little calmer and I would be "settled" its still chaos. Maybe its me, maybe its life? Either way here I am along for the ride, I will try to enjoy it if I can.

[sarcastibich.livejournal.com]

Hey, I don't know how to get ahold of Rob but I thought he might like this link for his annual "weird stories from science in the last year" panel at InCon. Plus, you might like it, too:

http://www.neatorama.com/2010/02/07/scientific-evidence-that-the-entire-universe-is-a-holographic-projection-around-the-earth/